Mirror mirror on the wall
魔镜魔镜告诉我
Who's the top anchor of them all?
谁是顶级主持人？
[Your're the top anchor Deer]
【你是顶级主持人迪迩】
I know I'm not
我知道自己不是
But going back to Trump
不过追溯到特朗普
or maybe a lot earlier
或者可能更早
the U.S. politicians have long been obsessed with being the first
美国政客一直痴迷于什么第一啊优先啊
which is okay
这倒也无所谓
lady first or whatever first
管他女士优先还是什么优先
I mean
我想说
Human history was made possible
人类之所以不断进步
by pushing forwad a "first"
的确往往先要有个“第一”
who's the obligated to go get the others
再由“第一”去带动其他人
In terms of economic strength
就经济实力而言
America is the first
美国是第一
But after being the first
但成为第一之后
Americat was like…
美国就⋯⋯
From this day forwad
从今天开始
It's going to be ONLY America First
以后“只能”美国优先（第一）
America First
美国优先（第一）
Yeah…The're so obsessed with being "the first"
没错⋯美国政客太执着于做“第一”了
that sometimes Americans are like
美国民众有时甚至会嘀咕
"Do we really deserve it?"
“我们真的配么？”
The U.S. soared from 13th
在一份所谓的“全球抗疫排名”上
to the world's Number One in the latest COVID Resilience Ranking
美国从第13位跃升至全球第一
Home come?
怎么弄的呢？
Because Bloomberg which compiled the ranking decided that 
因为编制该排行榜的美国彭博社决定
death tolls and caseloads no longer matter
确诊病例和死亡人数一概不计
Even prevention measures like lockdowns and quarantines are considered red marks in the ranking
封锁和隔离等防疫措施反倒成了减分项
And here's the craziest part
最疯狂的是
The title of the ranking is "The Best And Worst Places to Be as The World Finally Reopens" 
榜单以《世界终于重启，最好和最坏的去处》为题
which means America is now the best country in the world to visit
这意味着美国现在成了全球最佳去处
With over 20 thousand new daily cases and hundreds dying every day?
每天新增病例超过2万、数百人死亡？
Best place to visit?
还最佳去处？
People are like
大家都说
Bloomberg lost its freakin's mind
彭博社脑子进水了
I'm not going, no, not me
我不去，不，我不去
Come on, Bloomberg
啥情况啊，彭博社
Really?
认真的吗？
But seriously
不过说真的
there's no need to go out of your way to be the first, America
美国你根本不用刻意去争第一
You've done a pretty good job already
这方面你已经做得很好了
You are the first in number of COVID cases and deaths
新冠病毒感染病例和死亡人数你排第一
You're the first in the polarization of rich and poor
贫富两极分化你排第一
in number of foreign wars waged
发起对外战争数量你排第一
You're the first in terms of gun violence
枪支暴力你排第一
You're the first in number of deaths form drug use
吸毒致死人数你排第一
You're the first in umber of prisoners
关押犯人数量你排第一
most of whom are people of color
大部分还都是有色人种
I could go on if you like being the first so much
如果你这么喜欢当第一，我还可以继续
Bloomberg is not your mirror
彭博社不是你的镜子
The numbers are
这些数字才是